I went to Angela's tonight. We danced our asses off. I wore my fur coat. It's so cold lately. And my fur coat is so warm and inviting. And that's my t.v. in the background and my computer. Good times. JoJo is starting to feel a bit better I think. Hope he is finally getting well.
I had to deal with some drama today.. Pat and I decided its best not to talk to each other. It will be easier on everybody this way. I'm not going to lie it hurts to lose a friend. But this is better for Patty. And better for Joseph and I. Maybe in the future we can be friends again.. I hope so. But for now..it's goodbye. A very sad goodbye. He told me alot of things about myself. Qualities he liked and advice for the future. I was too sad and confused to say anything back. But if I could have I would have told him nice things too. Things I have told him before. Like you're not a bad person you are just reserved. Everybody has problems it doesn't make you a fuck up. Things like that. But mostly I would have wanted to tell him.. Me being heartbroken about you wasn't your fault. You just weren't in love with me. And it was a good thing that you broke up with me when you did rather than lead me on. But communication and being open are two things you should work on. I will always remember the both of us trying so hard to be better people. The "fuck ups" that just wanted to be better for each other. It wasn't the healthiest relationship in the world. But it was a relationship that helped me grow. And helped me feel like I wasn't a freak. That somebody out there understood me and was like me in alot of ways. And he helped me and I helped him. And sometimes I still get scared that I'm not mature enough for somebody like Joseph or that we aren't going to work out. But I know that if it wasn't for my relationship with Patty I wouldn't have even caught Joseph's eye probably. I've grown so much since that punk 15 year old kid. Cheers to that at least.
Quotes of the day:
Me: "Thanks much."
Me: "Bad mood much?"
Me: "Epic much."
Me: "I just now realized I say much too much."
Question of the day:
Why the hell does Beebe have to have different Channels than Cabot?
I had to deal with some drama today.. Pat and I decided its best not to talk to each other. It will be easier on everybody this way. I'm not going to lie it hurts to lose a friend. But this is better for Patty. And better for Joseph and I. Maybe in the future we can be friends again.. I hope so. But for now..it's goodbye. A very sad goodbye. He told me alot of things about myself. Qualities he liked and advice for the future. I was too sad and confused to say anything back. But if I could have I would have told him nice things too. Things I have told him before. Like you're not a bad person you are just reserved. Everybody has problems it doesn't make you a fuck up. Things like that. But mostly I would have wanted to tell him.. Me being heartbroken about you wasn't your fault. You just weren't in love with me. And it was a good thing that you broke up with me when you did rather than lead me on. But communication and being open are two things you should work on. I will always remember the both of us trying so hard to be better people. The "fuck ups" that just wanted to be better for each other. It wasn't the healthiest relationship in the world. But it was a relationship that helped me grow. And helped me feel like I wasn't a freak. That somebody out there understood me and was like me in alot of ways. And he helped me and I helped him. And sometimes I still get scared that I'm not mature enough for somebody like Joseph or that we aren't going to work out. But I know that if it wasn't for my relationship with Patty I wouldn't have even caught Joseph's eye probably. I've grown so much since that punk 15 year old kid. Cheers to that at least.
Quotes of the day:
Me: "Thanks much."
Me: "Bad mood much?"
Me: "Epic much."
Me: "I just now realized I say much too much."
Question of the day:
Why the hell does Beebe have to have different Channels than Cabot?
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